After the Break ...

Been FOR AGES!!! I'll explain.  I've had a wake up call in the form of Scoriatic Arthritis ... Not good, debilitating.  So ... I'm on my way to losing the best part of 90 pounds.  I'm 30 down with another 60 to go.

So this was me 30lbs ago

And this is me now, a third of the way there

So how have I done it?  I've given myself permission to be worth more, in effect to have a complete mental shift.  I was an emotional eater.  Once I identified that AND owned it I knew I had the power to control it.

I also knew I had been told by a well meaning if horrendously misguided Grandmother and Great Grandmother that I had a weight problem from about 6/7 years old 'You'd be so Bonny if you just lost that weight' replaced by 'When are you losing this weight, come on, for me' Both of which made me eat for comfort to stop the tears and the hurt.  I didn't have a weight issue at the time, I was well built but certainly not fat, however by the time I was in my Teens I had a well developed weight problem thanks to their intervention.

That stayed with me until I let it go 4 years ago. It has taken me this long to expunge the hurt from those repeated words and to no longer 'need it' ... anyone with a weight issue will get the whole 'needing the excuse' thing.  I decided I'm better than that and deserve more.

I researched the tools I needed to succeed and STAY successful.  I've sorted out my current Basal Metabolic Rate, or BMR and created a series of menus to keep my Totally Daily Expenditure or TDEE above nutritional deprivation but below excess calories, which is a fine line.  I of course add in the exercise I do which is 40 minutes of intense swimming 5 days a week and make the allowances for that in the TDEE.

In line with current thinking My exercise level will be upped to include 30 minutes of low impact high exertion  gym work 3 times a week when I expect to hit plateau at about 30 lbs to go.  I'm not taking diet shakes, or food replacement or any kind of slimming club, many of which don't show any kind of long term weight loss success.  I have however totally changed my lifestyle and more importantly my entire mindset.  Truly, it's hard work.

It takes a supreme amount of effort to ignore the internal me jumping up and down begging for sweet treats to 'make it all better'.  But I've noticed there is a louder voice which is the voice of my internal fitness coach.   Their voice booms and has made me both teetotal and very aware of not eating pap as both are totally counterproductive.  I've cut out aspartame, processed food and cut my sugar intake by 90%, all of which has been tough, there have been tears and there have been moments when I wanted to give up, I realised I'm stronger than that.


This is not a diet, it is a new way of life.  It is NOT for everyone, it takes continual mindfulness and a body awareness I didn't know I had - It takes daily commitment.

Our whole family has made the shift, we walk much more, we eat less and better, we spend more time doing family activities which include exercise instead of food, we've replaced going for a fun picnic with going to play a fun game of Cricket and a picnic.  My partner who is doing as well as I am has found the same mental shift taking place and is amazed at how intense the feeling of satisfaction is knowing you're strong enough to choose not to fail.  

I'll check when I'm another 301bs down!